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中共国能熬过经济停滞吗?

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threats of robbing in poverty infused PRC by CCP dog.

2 weeks 1 day ago
Jun 13, 2017 a relaxing dream in which I visited my artist friends in Tianjin art college. at first I dreamt with BianQiong, my Tibet painter friend, and his friend. they live in dorm like a family. then shifted to a house near gate and some of those students there working and chatting. I using English with a friend from my hometown neighbor county, who is humble and treated me well during my visited BianQiong in vacation, so the moment didn't paid him enough attentions but kindness felt. he sometimes mixed with my impression on another guy in the art college who also attracted me with his able attitude. we chatted in English but my English seemingly not fluent enough and sometimes the students there in the house perceived it. its a peaceful dream and I without any pressure but enjoy staying. last 2 weeks I too busy to blog. my son's nexus 6 lost after forgot to fetch after sporting, likely accompanied by his sinful intrusive mom, a really small woman and poor gifted junior teacher. but next day she registered the lost on local stadium administrative and it returned intact. I even disappointed by my son's loose management and bad habit, but ready to accept the misfortune. my son really glad to regain his nexus, he hummed upstairs when I waiting him in Sunday visit after the sad news. last week I under heavy government sponsored hacking, detained my downloading windows 10 creator edition iso. I also tried to rebuild router OS after disastrous intrusion. I failed times and times to make configurations backup. later I gave up backup now that if I left most of router profile default then will be less shortage of ram and lagging response. we also elated with new auto-connecting script and localized vpn server script, a byproduct huge finding during googling our problems. it fix our pains on ass of vpn connection which frequented by PRC surveillance and problematic and time-consuming. its really a great achievement saves. as though most of the weeks busy and fruitful, PRC surveillance turns freakier now. my facing dorm moved in some young beasts, one with stylish pig tail on his head, staying all day indoor gabbled. most nights when I went to toilet and back, their door left opener and room light turned down, like a sinister black eye hole peeking, just remind me their capable of surveillance, poisoning, and stealth. that sometimes made me unease, but I know who is more unbalanced and revengeful. I put my fate in holy bliss. let thieves trying rob me in day time and in shadows. CCP and PRC literally makes everyone poorer day by day, minute by minute. its a burning fire heap that destroys any surplus in Chinese society. God, bring me sooner my Royal China. bring me my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for better management of my life, of my Empire of China from my heroic ancestor. bring us surprise in this month salary day. May 28, 2017 dreamt in a journey and next day we will return. I designed a multimedia and have to change some text in it. I tried many ways then found have to install then hack text string, one for title, one for calculation result. then in a class there are some guests. a black child played with my son and slammed my son's face. I angry with my son and urged him to slam back. then the black dad join the war and forced me to pay more attention and compensation. that's likely concerns about my son's English tutor his sinful mom arranged under a black man's lecture in her college, Qiqihar Univ, where she still felt romantic or fantasy. yesterday google alphago, AI powered chess rebot, beat all human Chinese go players. back to bed, dream continue about the lost. I saw some collegians lived around, like QRRS dorm stuffed by young blue-collar workers. I tried asking if they saw my suitcase. no one listened in their games. one of them likely my once QRRS colleague in tech department, Chen Ziming, who left QRRS for better career prospective decade ago, later told me alone that I too risky to put my baggage outside of door and packed valued items inside. I should pay for my careless. its a long morning and my late dream echos turbulent wind outside of window. last night my stomach painful midnight and I had to get up to shit twice to relieve the uncomfort. the dorm canteen's operator, the husband of the woman, turned hostile to me. the marching team in dusk around QRRS square also hated me, just like I didn't appreciate their noisy boombox and coarse taste of music, too. young workers esp close neighbored in the dorm long time grudged with me, trying all means to upset me, to hurt me. the dangers in mop sometimes put me in chill. but I have nothing but mission. coming lunar dragon boat holiday let me so lonely, like the Chinese girl Yang shuping lectured in her graduation ceremony in US aroused so many blind hates in sinking PRC young dogs, exactly her plain true thankful emotion toward American years educated her. dog PRC hated anything out of its humility. they turning China more and more mirror of bankrupted MidEast, purest poverty, now that they never care anything in the world out of their mouths, or their teeths' tearing and grinding, world of mere prey. God, dad, bring me sooner my vested Empire from my grand ancestor, for harmony Chinese family and life. bring me soone my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for sanity of nowadays Chinese society. bring me more offspring for future 1109 years my new Empire of China reset for span timespace. grant us a merry holiday, esp woz's last children holiday coming less than a week. May 22, 2017 dreamt at my hometown with my old family who all catering a new baby whose centered likely my son. lots of relatives jammed in the bedroom once my old parents prepared for their first next generation's wedding, my 2nd brother's. I held the infant and sending him sleep but in a blink I only holding blanket while the baby missing. then on the edge of bed and edge of the entrance of the room, on uneven stone or plastic teeth of a plate the infant sleeping. his head left on bare rugged without clothes cushion but thank God its OK. we carefully shift him to new infant bed. my 2nd elder brother's wife, their first son, my 3rd elder sister esp helpful in caring relatives crowd. the infant under so many attentions that I felt he must be my newly born son. in second view during a break I thought he might be my brother's 2nd son's first son. the nephew married a neighbor village girl then soon divorced. he now rumored dislikes woman and kept single, that's his mother claimed about her own son in front of me in our latest hometown tour. I think he more likes his grandpa than his elder brother, who had 3 children now, and merits belongs to be our family members but not a clue in his mom who bold and shameless feminism, like generous, honest, integrity, kind, etc. I told him my appreciation in once QQ chat session decade ago when he still a boy. today is Monday morning. I again in chill felt boring and napped. yesterday I bought my son small fishes and shrimps from an elder amateur vendor who is lonely and hopeless aside the road where I went alone to buy fruits. I intended to do him a favor but he refused aid. so I bought his all he charged ¥15, a small heap small fishes and a small heap of shrimps. I left him a peach and 2 CNY extra and fled to evade the elder's defying. I told my son how small fishes with small hot pepper can be delicious for in my teenage my 2nd elder brother quite sometimes bring home the food material after his school, ie. he caught fishes in pond or rice fields after school hours. it left me life long appetite. I really hope my son find the delicacy but so far I unable to contact him on the phone about the dish the grandma loathed to prepare with before I left in Sunday dusk. I also bought my son extra fruits, including litchi and mango, peach, for my son loathed to let me buy fruits after showered in public bathroom. I feed him with litchi and mango before left him alone in his android games. we really enjoyed the fruits. on Wednesday I will fetch his birthday cake ordered online, and celebrate his 13 birthday together ( woz 12 birthday reported here). God dad, I recently felt more solider to accept de facto that my offspring limits to one son. I trust Holy arrangement and humble of my son's mother family, her insanity. God dad, grant me more children in my prime time. bring me sooner my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko. link our nations, our blood bond on new land that shared among us. bring more laugh and companions in my life in family forever hospitable and bright.
BTW, these days media reveals misery of pangolins which extincting after sinful PRC Chinese insane appetite, God, dad, pl save the adorable animal, which is key to remain rampant ants lair everywhere those years under control. let's bee and pangolin forever happily enjoy the planet as we do. God dad, pl! May 21, 2017 dreamt with ample details after migrated into US. an elder Chinese woman with her spouse contacted me for rent her house or living matters in America. yesterday I happily dispatched salary and sliced it into feeding small bills due monthly, ie. laundry, groupon for salon, spa, dining out. woz's birthday celebration also booked. local debtee received partial return. God dad, grant me next month reserves for my hosting plan renewal on godaddy. this week also somewhat busy. I napped on Monday morning after found jobless and exhausted after joys of reunited son the day before. Tuesday morning I restored, found I can add feedback form onto my google sites. then I launched to learn google form, component of Gsuite, to enrich my website's interactivity. my long time afraid of form and script in microsoft office suite cured by google form's easy to use. in an hour I built up my survey for my google sites and published, inc checkbox, multi-choice, rate, scale, dropdown, pictures etc lots of elements of interactive. google form's response analysis amazingly rich, in pie chart, bar chart, and lots of charts that's easy understanding while informative first impression. Friday I rebuilt my portable os on a retired ssd, after failed to fix ubuntu's lingering error. this time I made the bootable images more cleaner and handier. in woz's monthly visit my dorm, I demonstrated him my websites' new element, survey. and we enjoyed snack routinely, and hot water washing feet powered by dorm's heater just recovered from broke down. dorm canteen loaned me ¥100, but God knows how we satisfied in our companion and companion of hard times. God dad, my living so far designated to deal with a salary ¥3000/month, how real during hopes and joys in dealing with the only source of income. God dad, how I endear my life within this tiny time space here and now on the planet and before climate disaster, while we stride into big chances never seen holy grants. bring me sooner my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, and my vested Empire of China, and our future new land of north and water peculiar cold sweet. grant my cyberspace startup booming in business and influential of public mind. thx for my new summer pants with mobile pockets my nephew offered free weeks ago in my hard time.

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©2006-2016 Zhuson.com中美一家神™
benzrad zhu

woz taller now 12 years.

1 month ago

May 25th no doubt a sunny day, in the cloudy week. but since the morning I felt gloomy. I looking for it to reunite my son so much that sores. before heading to fetch birthday cake I trying complete remnant work concerning my future 2nd child, billing zhu's facebook account, which disabled by facebook cluelessly, the freaky dominant social network more and more likes a giant monster. I then claimed another fb account under id billingzh , and added it to admin of facebook page, billinzh. that morning before my work starts, the internet is dead. buzzed the dorm director who confirmed that fiber optic cable damaged by ongoing refurnish in 3rd dorm of QRRS dorm. waiting awhile I yet can't access vpn so I open my compute stick which has builtin vpn under windows. then I found the mini computer frequently automatically shutdown. later probe found likely usb power insufficiency is the cause. in first frustration I tried to reinstall windows 10 now that a month passed yet it can't get its creator edition upgrade, lest intrusion of malware. then found my downloaded iso image months ago broken, failed to install. likely sinking PRC surveillance intervened my download. for time limit I left rebuilding open and took bus to fetch woz's birthday cake booked online in the early week. I obviously felt failed on bus even didn't figure out why. in the cake store I mandated to show groupon code but my vpn on android phone failed to open shared sms logbook on gdocs and last ten minutes before settled. I tried to tease a young girl in the shop, claiming last 2 years when I fetched cake there was only a female, now 2 boys and 2 girls there so it must be prosperous. the girl don't understand but politely responded. on bus to woz's house, I more or less in peace. out of his elemental school the grandma also there fetching him, but soon left. my son in shabby white shirt and told me he just in performance within 20 kids performed e-piano for celebrating some event. and the weekends also shifted to next day, ie Monday will be Sunday agenda and so on. I just can't in ritual mood. arrived his mom's house, I arranged woz to setup birthday cake and shot for publishment. woz also less elated like last year's birthday with cake. when I asked him his plan for future, he again claimed want to travel, aside higher school exam score. that both failed me. exam score less important to me, an entrepreneur prospect of future my son, either, and travel with his sinful mom just too risky and reckless. and he previously claimed he want less travels after last 2017 lunar spring festival hometown tour. he must lured by his desperate mom who sought escape all times. he didn't eat much birthday cake I bought, which likely bigger and dearer than last year's. I also felt no mood to taste the delicacy, and soon left there. on way to return my dorm, I first thought It was just a case to refrain myself from indulging dwelling with my son weekends. I can suffer and that's all. woz can enjoy light heart everywhere and anytime. in dorm I published event photos and videos and more turned peaceful. then I gradually saw sins and risks in my son's spiteful mom's death journey. my son shouldn't take the bait to sink, by the weight of his mom's dirty tuitions she gathered in shameless home hours from preying PRC cheap parents. I sms my son lately around 10pm and told him my thoughts upon the undue consumer commodity harmful for a kid, for its his dying mom's entertainment, meaningless and drainful. in the next morning I napped all the morning, gathering courage to cope my loneliness and self-supportive. I decide to live up with my sites, zhone portal, for holy commitment and longest prelude of my 1109 years life of China Empire inherited from my ancestor, from my dad, God in Heaven now, for my son and my offspring still at large in their idle times ample and anxious free. God dad, I pray for strength and luminance inside for glow and growth. I pray holy mercy for the aging and solitary in molding my kingdom and generations. Dad God, I saw so many meanings in comparing Mideast and Eastern Asia, and life's withering and blossoming and their mountain difference. let me put it under lightment. let my mission more prominent, Dad God.

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©2006-2016 Zhuson.com中美一家神™
benzrad zhu

for delayed warmth of summer 2017

1 month 2 weeks ago
May 12, 2017 firstly dreamt likely in airport lounge, I with my son in queue for aboard. then it broke for awhile to let cargo unload. its likely railway cargo, emergent quilts and pillows for distressed people in problematic situation. once the queue restored, the conductor persuaded us buying sapling on the way, instead of brought it from hometown to destiny, for former mostly more resilient. after peed and returned to bed, I dreamt with my old family, relatives. we criticized each other, we enjoyed chatters, we are family. esp my mean nephew, ie. only son of my passed eldest sister who committed suicide in her mid age decades ago, who is so mean that defied my small loan request several times. we disappointed by counterpart but still we expecting. this week was a bit leisure. I picked up my zohosites and sorted them into precious assets. quite some web services allow early birds privilege more gracious than its current mature clients which generate stable product income. google apps and zoho sites are such cases. previously zohosites free charge of custom domain mapping for its sites users, but now it charges. in recent years I saw zohosites potential and powerful on web building, and more and more willing making better usage of it. so this week I enable all free functions zohosites offers for free old users, like blogs, spam control, custom form, collaborators, etc. I was so contented by the gains! in final step, I collect and sort them into my local bookmarks and web linkbook. this week also specially hard for my financially coping with coming events, weekend gathering my son, woz into dining out and monthly cinema, his coming birthday celebration, his lottery experience I promised to support on the event, and my longing for a new ring mouse to replace my old Microsoft arc touch. in God's bliss, QRRS dispatched one child policy reward, ¥60, yesterday. then I gathered courage from it to contact my niece in Wuhan, central China, for aid. she generously offered ¥400, doubles my entrust. with it I immediately ordered the innovative mouse on taobao.com. but sinking PRC surveillance again exploited and delayed near 2 days in logistics: so far since last morning my order status still remains paid rather than dispatched, or relay of expresses, which quite abnormal nowadays bragging next day delivery but usual in my case in recent years shopping online. they surveillanced my vpn in accurate in seconds: most cases under surveillances my critical submission online result in immediate time out or offline. my conversation with my son, each time broke amid, esp when I urging him adopting securer connection. however, my sweet companion of google music, these days last hours daily and that eases a lot pressure. coming weekend brings many hope of joys when I gather woz, dearest son. God, dad, I'm so contented with my life here so far, that almost leaves me more silence of harmony. bring me sooner my Royal China to be more productive. bring me Asoh Yukiko for brighter future family, and our offspring that drives the eastern Asia coming centuries. thx for sunshine outside, dad God, I know summer is soon under your shine. May 6, 2017 first dreamt in a party where cult or mythical power shown by a mojo, likely in San Francisco or western coast of US. dark magic of superpower, manipulation of mind and fate. then in my routine space when I shitting I was surveillanced. I got up for pee. then dreamt among my senior school alumni, we saw magic robot through which one's life and properties can be exported and imported. there are several robots all can export and when you delete some information it can be restored by other robot peer. most dream details lost after sleepily got up. it's a drizzling morning after 2 or 3 days windy weather, or sandstorms, which tinted sky into brown. rains seemingly due ample but this summer scarce so far. however most plants turning green. last night I refined zhone sites on zohosites, but PRC surveillance heavily blocked me. I finished near 12am and satisfied. I also blessed in success gaining loan from dorm canteen, ¥300, for new public bathroom groupon and other small bills. yesterday bankcommm buzzed in, blamed me not return credit debt as ¥2000 as planned rather ¥1500 I paid in 2 series months. I explained my life should put first, esp my with kid while my salary under expectation. she threatened to sue me. I just can't see how ¥500 means so much for a bank, and how severe I broke my promise with ¥500 less. this noon I will visit my son, which I almost can't wait, for the relief loan, for new restaurant we found last labor day holiday, railway hotel which likely a SOE with proper standard at least we saw rich ready meals in addition luxury leisure space. and for my works review in a week. but financial situation still stern: next weekend movies, 4 gathering meals in weekends before next salary day 2 weeks out, woz's birthday celebration, etc. my sites hosting plan needs renew, ¥60/month. dad God, my life so fit that I envy nobody. let me walk through difficulties like on meadow. prepare us for greater descending, and forever uprising. dad God, bring me sooner my Royal China to overcome surreal. bring me my family clean and tidy with Asoh Yukiko, for our children coming heavenly. thx for the moisture last night and now, God, for the baptism in rough of rotten atmosphere ever seen. May 4, 2017 first dreamt my passed mother brought me, a kid, to a training center. its a bit unreal, for my childhood never had out class tutorials in rural central China. but my son, woz, he was arranged quite some by his teacher mom. in the center an elder woman teacher whose student includes Dilraba, the hot Uygur actress in PRC now, exchanged words with my mom while I was impressed by the famous girl student. then on a train, Dilraba just aboard and seated feet apart me. she is alone and a bit unease in my gaze. I watched her and her natural beauty likes neighbor door girl, clean and untouched. when a foreigner or small English talk out heard in the carriage, she complained in murmur her English not good enough to catch up it, with which I echoed in common sense. in the dream I likely feeling collegian youth. its a brown morning. the overnight sandstorm left the air dirty and tinted. but in air dusts didn't felt. my breakfast in dorm canteen still satisfying, even in 2 series days the menu less choices on it. this early summer quite chill in Qiqihar, northeastern China. I usually have to put on winter coat against coldness in dorm. last morning I napped after breakfast in boring chill and idle. amazon video, esp old time real people movies inspired me a lot with righteous moral, standard of life and loyalty. recently quite some movies on elders' life caught me in my mindless picks. I was so enchanted that I pray God to keep me the secret of the hidden treasure of meanings and gospel. my life enriched by review of my campus loves movies aroused. I saw timeless love and purity of sanity stems out independently we were young. I saw flourishing lives in my life then and now fautless brilliant. God, dad, my son, woz, Hope of China, his birthday near in May, I promised him each birthday offer him ¥150 for lottery experience. and cake for celebration. we also have cinema agenda next weekend. and our spa groupon should renewed. dad, God, free me off trap of financial problem. with my dear sister's son's aid, I got webcam as longing after a month, I greatly refreshed by its inauguration in my workspace last 2 weeks. now I want to replace my frequently ill working microsoft Arc touch bluetooth mouse with a new innovative gear, ring mouse. aid me ¥100 for it. dad God, liberate me in this month's salary. bring me sooner my Royal China, esp my Crowned Queen, Asoh Yukiko, from Japan, to cater to our family and living. bring my children in time in our hatch before lapse of my prime time. thx for the life we enjoy so far and so frontmost. May 1, 2017 dreamt in a dorm, Nankai campus or my QRRS dorm, I busy with my desktop. likely previously I played with water and sands through my under pants and gathered on my bottom. So I took off underpants and half naked. but Zhang Chongfu, my Nankai deputy monitor, brought a girl visitor and she waiting outside of the door. I at the moment can't find my underpants and later someone thrown me it or I found it somewhere. with almost put right I woke up. this PRC international labor day holiday almost again a disaster for me: I hardly support any treat entitles it. I ate a meal a day and still worring next 3 weekends' gathering dinning out with my son, woz, Hope of China. however passed weeks proves fruitful in heavy workload. I second time install Google Apps on woz new zte android without a single error after many failures missing in wrong files and their directories, as a false response to previous google play store pending download but forever zero traffic as penalty to region like PRC where google denied. I also deleted problemed payment account lest locked out again for PRC's shame. I also found google doesn't delete its gsuite account after our purchase for zho.io 2 email accounts phrased out due to unpaid on time. encouraged by the cheat, I applied 3 new gsuites for our new 3 domains, each claimed several GA accounts under trial period and hoping these accounts' chrome sync, contacts, custom search engines and other user data/settings maintained out of free trial period. we fatally love google's web sync service. last Friday I also found time to rip spam bots, minor errors on my dynamic sites, esp forum at bbs.zhuson.com and cms at agarten.in. after near a year running the web apps roughly familiared, I more or less more experienced with their structure, system, just like I perceived and executed, like other insights in my life so far holy grants. long time pains in ass, disorder among articles on dabbog.com, also totally relinked structurally. my son now seemingly likes to bring new smartphone with him, after many times I cursed him for unreachable online. when I can't access him I wondered why it is so painful. I saw most important thing I needed to share with him is my achievement in life stream. I need treat, celebration for holy witness and double joys devil eyes stolen most. but I prepared to live alone my stuff in my darker and longer journey ahead, in my aging world of coldness, hatred thick dusty land I stood decades. I don't afraid death nor rotten time, I only care holy bliss, and my mission here in northeastern China for future millennium, for Japan, US and my vested land of China Empire from my glorious ancestor. God, dad, its lunch time now, grant us an adequate lunch for the leisure time. bring me sooner my Royal China to outpace the curious eyes upon my legend. bring me sooner my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for my children's cosy family space.

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©2006-2016 Zhuson.com中美一家神™
benzrad zhu

wake up 2 new domains, zuo.center & woga.me

2 months 2 weeks ago
Apr 10, 2017dreamt of the family of my cousin, ie. husband of my mother's niece. I once liked his 2nd daughter who was tall and slender. but long time works in farm worn out her hands which drove me away from her in my senior middle school summer vacation and never return. I saw her new family in dream. her dad, a communist cadre in his village, a selfish impetus driver for many children even complied others to abide one child policy, invented or bought to connect his family with his offspring's family, and his properties with wire. the wire likely controlled digitally. I saw just dial "home to farm" and the 2 place linked and can communicate online. I still felt warm with the girl and her sisters and her child. then dreamt I made experiment, in which I put pencil core into a tiny tube and heated to melt it. when I saw it changed into liquid, just when I ready to fill in something with it, the power down. at the mean time I urgent to urine. I pee indoor before others returning to caught me in sight. almost peed and with caution of fire, I woke up. last week my family acquired another 2 precious domains, zuo.center and woga.me. zuo.center is my first and likely last unconventional TLD. most of newly added TLDs are expensive, but .center renewal is $20. the same amount with .me, which I promoted most to my son woz, hoping he regards woga.me for his video game hobby as himself invented. I told my son I contented with 21 domains before my business getting bigger, and I didn't regret risks I taken in the purchase even more or less I felt my greediness in the making of namespace, claim of meaning and naming. I hope in a market, its normal to profit from intelligent property. after 3 days intensive works, I prepared publication sites for the 2 domains, inc google sites, zoho sites, blogger blogs, tumblrs, etc. I show my son webpage editing and publishment skill, hoping he enjoy freedom of cyberspace as I did. yesterday I ate delicacies in gathering woz dining out. he ordered his favorite sausage in Taiwanese franchise restaurant, Formosa pies. I also fed him mango I sliced large portions by fork and fruit knife. sometimes I wonder if my main treat is just eating. but God's know I barely fed each normal day. God, dad, bring me sooner my Royal China. bring me my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for better life and warmth of homage. grant us a spacier salary this month for our planned expenditure. thx, dad, for coming canteen breakfast.
Apr 9, 2017dreamt first shared dorm with an once QRRS colleague who is a photographer. he is a gay in dream and spying me. anything of him will convey gay sensation when I touch them. then dream in a TV cuisine competition. I was a candidate and my dish too slippery to stand vegetables in decorative arrangement. I was in hurry and failed many times. then once my boss, QRRS cable TV chief editorial who died in mid age, pointed out the cause emotionlessly. when I almost gave up my works, I woke up and in anxious of visiting my son weekend on time. last week is a strange week testifying relation of my son woz and me, his dad. on Monday which also in lunar Mourning holiday we booked cinema as usual together. that day had been shifted a day for all PRC people gathering 3 days holiday for escape and adjust a weekend for workday. the disgusting convenience chasing hobby humiliates meaning of week from the bible, unlike US holidays, shown worldly profane of Communism Chinese. when I went over in time to fetch my son to cinema, he was absent while his mom tutored some students there as usual. I waited half hour till time didn't permit waiting. I buzzed the grandma who is really an old fox, stubborn and canning, evasive when I ordered her sent my son to cinema directly. my son already told me he will be totally free when we booked tickets together. so my son forgot his timetable or his sinful mom or grandma tentatively assigned my son's occupation with his pointless art class away from our scheduled pastime. when I arrived cinema and buzzed the grandma again, she still trying selling my son to postpone the movie. my son wanted to talk to me, but my rages out of control and I yelled him to come over at once. when they arrived, I at once beat my son while the grandma repeated that I was insane. I beat my son before the movie and during movie, we didn't exchange anything while our back seat trying closer to us to tease us, likely official surveillance. on way to lunch out, I beat my son again for disappointed and humilitation, for his unable to administrate his life on his own. I scorned and beat him during lunch. after returned to his mom's house, I fetched my missed a day dirty clothes after shower and left without entering the house. after I settled in dorm, my kid brother who almost blacklisted my phone, called in. he was informed by my son's mom or grandma that my violence can bring me into asylum again if I exert it again on my son. I laughed and told him that they can do anything as they will, I'm not feared. my brother claim I turning odd, and I shouldn't push my son so hard to American for here in China I should abide with its situation. I replied there are two way to learn after America, one way sending out richer Chinese to US, another way is bring US to China. in coming most of the week, my son kept muted when I buzzed him and sms him. I shifted our new Chinese phone from fiber optic internet bundle to him at the end of lunch and he promised will keep mobile phone reachable like an adult. even in the week I urgent to add backup phone to our 2 godaddy accounts. after 3 days including failed contacted godaddy support, I got thing done with synced sms log via ifttt I previously setup on the phone. on Saturday I lingered on bed lately to avoid boring and hard choice if I visit my son as usual. then my son sent me sms of verification code his phone received and I asked to transfer to me but denied times. I replied immediately that things done and asked if shower on Sunday as planned or plan B. my son didn't response me graciously. I soon decided to visit him. it's noon. I visited dorm canteen to fetch my washed clothes there, and borrow another ¥200 for gathering my son in dinning out together. when I entered the house, my son's mom blocked the door and questioned in what privilege I frequent there. I didn't reply and evade her into visit my son in his bedroom where he practicing e-piano. after they left for music class his mom arranged, I sorted my son's nexus in English podcast's companion. after they returned I tried awhile video game then my son dined out with me. now I can say storm of separation dissolved with consent of my son's once under performance. he should be more independent, out of childish custody. God, dad, Friday night drizzle blessed us. now shinny morning sunshine covers my concerns with triumph. bring me sooner my Royal China, my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko. bring our better life in reach. grant us financial independent to broaden our cyberspace investment. allow us buy stylish pants with mobile pockets, and a camera for my desktop computer. pl resume my visa card and its credit limit sooner. thx God dad for all these years' affirmative.
Mar 30, 2017dreamt with a slim guy who help doing scientific experiments like astronaut. I roamed with him in front of a lab where just gained fund to launch research. I saw my friend won the contract to execute experiment with his physic manipulation. last night I finally checked in my son's google domains account and found my only working credit card defied by google for region of PRC. so recharging our gvoice accounts impossible. I had to through godaddy to claim my new domain, my only new unconventional TLD, zuo.center. just before that near dusk I talked to my son in air that I can't help clinching those namespace I concocted, I want to buy him a domain he likes and cultivates like his own mirage garden. I suggested woga.me as google domains suggested to me and let him known I waiting for his response and impetus. in late night my kid brother sms back telling his paypal can't remit me $60 I previously sent him ¥420 for conversion because paypal denies. I told him just sent my deposit back in alipay. I teased him I constantly putting money into business while he had been withdrawing money from his workshop to purchase real estate. I warned him someday my properties might surplus his. got back to bed, I can't sleep but got up to check if he immediately sent my money back. after found the fund at its position, I launched to buy our 2 new domains on godaddy. its swift done. with these precious assets in hand, I felt surreal to acknowledge. I burned so many brains for them, identified their beauties in language correlation. I blamed myself in front of my son for my greediness but after all, Dad God, I'm so lucky to earn with my intelligence fast as finger tips. God dad, curb my passionate with domain and focus me on my enviable assets sustain and site building, ie. value mounting. bring me my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, and free me from greediness. thx dad, in this sober dawn and joyful after battle scene, I means salvage of settlement and peace of bliss.
Mar 29, 2017last night I dreamt of a senior middle school student. he likely researched something and wrote quite something. I with my son then in front of their school informed another girl classmate of the hidden book of the boy. it likely a notebook of weapon or martial art, or fantasy novel. I also dreamt rechargeable batteries we bought dearly from taobao rather than amazon turns poor quality and totally out of usable. last night I went to bed earlier, for praying my kid brother remitting USD I entrusted him for conversion from ¥420 I badly squeezed from salary last week and sent him immediately. for he owning a mall workshop and possibly has USD corporate account. I will recharge our google voice with them, and hopefully if my brother raises his hand to some allowance, I will purchase my last domain, the only new unconventional LTD, .center. my heart beats for the domain inspires me after I found my blessed namespace with it. and I surely known how severely my economy dangerous. last night its warm as usual, but this morning it drizzles, sometimes with snowflakes flow around. this week I enjoyed so many meaningful videos, including movies online. my life so rich with borderless web. and started with this week, I aimless on my site building. I sometimes napped after breakfast and worked focused after 10am. every night I went to bed with thanksgiving. the dorm canteen more and more treats me graciously: my food in monthly boarding and lodging bundle turns richer and more delicious. my laundry deal with the working woman executes smoothly, as last week I paid her first time in time with my salary which near ¥3000. my credit debt to bankcomm lower to 7800CNY, hopefully I can renew my hosting plan with it after reset 4 months later. dad God, I really need a credit card to cope with trifle bills. grant me a credit card with foreign currency. bring me sooner my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, bring my son his real mother, and shelter our roof under starry sky with dreams and tears of spiritual inspirations. God, grant me tools I need for building new China Empire in new 21 Century. equip me financial independence to survive the coming brutal economic crisis in the world fallen.
woz crayon painting in his art class his mom arranged. (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({});

©2006-2016 Zhuson.com中美一家神™
benzrad zhu

in march of spring.

3 months 1 week ago
Mar 18, 2017 at first dreamt of Emma Watson whose private photos leaked on web. I enjoy amazing sex with her. then dreamt I arrange my son woz to be trained by instrumental music under old traditional musician likely from QRRS art troupe which includes an old man and woman each. then in Mao's era he or we sent to western China to re-educate. we passed through dangerous Yellow River which threaten its bank area. we arrived northwestern China and planted a tree from our hometown. then dreamt I trained my son or myself badminton. I long time easily mimic serving but response speed far from satisfying when dealing or rebound. in dream I wonder if I just lack boring but heavy exercises or real expertise coached. this week again especially busy. I setup google authenticator app for our frequent google accounts 2 step verification. for sms verification less convenient and less secure in which each time informs PRC surveillance my logon. GFW heavily blocked my operation first place, once lagged me more than half hour to load an authentication code page, forced me to retreat mid way for dinner. but next day I did it again without pains. yesterday dabbog.com backend web app updated by godaddy hosting automatically, but it broke and halt the site. when I tried to fix it, I again heavily blocked. loading loops, irresponsible webpage, etc. I left its breakdown open possible vulnerable well known and went jog after dinner. in the night after dinner, I fixed it with less human pests, while again my restored sites less accessible on my dorm internet, but web proxy testifies its soundness. my facing dorm room has new residents. a young guy frequently loose its door and shown himself on the deeper bed busy in the leaking light. I doubting if he welcome visitors or exchange of neighborhood, or just convenient to spy me. but my internet these days actually under harsher surveillance and intervenes amid. but this week not all sad, I sorted our google voice assets and prepared to make good use of them. I deploy more google or google apps accounts for maintain their gvoice in use. now salary will arrive days, God dad, grant me freedom to recharge our accounts for smooth operative. grant me financial freedom for coming laundry bill to woman in dorm canteen, ¥200. I also badly need trousers with mobile pocket for my son and my own. dad God, godaddy hosting plan soon needs renewal. and I usually penniless before year end bonus. get me out of the dangerous situation, dad God, bring my cyberspace startup with my other concerns peacefully onto faezrland, our vested land from my ancestor under Holy. bring it with bliss and breeze.
Mar 11, 2017 first dreamt in highly dense space, human crowd with dense snakes. those baby snakes in every atom of air, or liquid, like spray. that's quite shockingly frightening. they didn't bite but terrifying. then dreamt my son and his mom's family. I likely returned from long journey and urged his mom to restore normal life. the woman and her mom recognized our previous marriage hopelessly sank. they arranged extraordinary a meal to farewell. when I prepare tea, I found many large strong black ants busy moving in the jar neck. its again such a shocking scene I almost lose clinch to the jar. they all likely concerns the first time handover of my laundry deal with dorm canteen woman. last week when I visited my son and brought him to shower in public shared bathroom, I found my dirty clothes a week there was not washed. the small woman several times threatened not to wash my clothes even I offered her monthly ¥150 many months but recently due to credit crisis I asked permission to indebted her. so this time I thought ripe to be more independent. I informed my son the new expense and he agreed. returned to dorm, I headed to dorm canteen where the woman in charge of preparing food materials right there for ordering. I discussed the possibility to pay her to wash my clothes. she first defied, with encouragement from the executive woman, she accept my proposal of increased ¥50 to ¥200/month. last Friday dusk, before I dined there, the executive woman fetched me the washed clothes, our first deal sealed, except my payment. for penniless, I asked the woman loan me ¥200 for visiting my son weekends. then she told me my recent months bill with canteen didn't settle, for my kid brother promised to pay remote instead of me in his last year's visit now evaded by him. I previously called him to pay my online shopping but my phone number likely blacklisted and redirected. so I never knew what's going on with him. the woman said she sms my brother but never responded. I told her I visioned I lost my brother's aid but I never equipped financially to save the situation, so I didn't probe my due payment in canteen any more. the woman disliked my answer so I promised will call my brother in the night. on jogging after dinner, I buzzed my 3rd elder sister and hope she check our kid brother's status, she accepted the task. when I went to toilet for toothbrush hours later, I saw the canteen worker woman washing there. I told her I will pay her as soon as I get my salary this month, ie. 2 weeks later. she replied no hurry cordially. God dad, I know it will be OK after all, but the situation now really draining. this week I also try web tutorial to setup selective vpn routing to escape PRC main sites' discriminating foreign ips, but so far failed. in so many programs I benefited from online communities discussions, now I have to cope it on my own for solution. I tried to contact vpn support team but out of their service scope and denied help. I also contact godaddy PRC office girl last time helped me with discount, for unknown renewal price increase, evasive conversations sucks in grudge. this week makes me sad when I last night reviewed it, but also affirm my determination to sit with them, those deny of service, and breakthrough on my own. God dad, bring me sooner my Royal China to sustain my cultivation here, bring me my new family and hope of stepping out of adversity here. bring me learning ability in every stages in my life. bring me my Crowned Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, to better my children's life. in a few hours I will visit my son, in your mercy our joys will double. Mar 2, 2017 dreamt of genius. dreamt my elder brothers, hometown folks, once leaders in QRRS, all turned old. I passed them who playing Majiang together and felt sad. then myself turns older and unbearable intelligent work. then a cheap soul like CCP cadre invents sculpturing on glass with color, replace paint on it manuscript or oil print. its merit is clear and vivid in 3D, but cost is material wasted once solid inscribed, not reusable. I wondered CCP administrative manner, reckless and environment unfriendly. then dream the inventor, a guy super genius: he needn't backup hardware settings, like I backup system images and important data times and relentlessly, he talks directly to hardware binary likes operates software in GUI. later he talked directly to a goat, let it be friend with me and my son. the goat hears and got it. yesterday woz's new trousers I ordered on taobao.com, for redeem my guilty in scorning him for no due respect of new broadband internet I installed him, arrived, for its deliverer, yto.com, well organized in its arena, really speedy. but what we demand, pocket for cellphone, not exists on the trousers, instead, a fake pocket without depth but just a zip for decoration. my son complained carrying smartphone in his jacket pocket can be clogging, and loathes to bring a new cheaper Chinese cellphone I prepared him all day long. returned to dorm, I tried to contact the taobao vendor. the site, taobao.com, quite discriminates its web service users, even punishing non client end app users, from geographic restriction to frequently failing web login or web im whose protocol solely supports itself. I switched 3 computers, from chromeos to android to windows, its im quits on all 3 platforms while previously it works sometimes. I lately find the vendor's mobile phone and settled replacing with new one our required pocket satisfied. I really need a cellphone pocketed trousers prices ¥80, too, but we just can't afford it now even its beneficence obvious and goodness predicts. in the night I watched a youtube documentary on world economic bubble burst emerging. that reminds my vision, Christian contrasts other poverty pestered world like PRC nowadays, or even total bankrupt wasteland, esp Islamic area, their competition lasts thousand years. government bailout grows larger and severer, esp Communist bureaucratic central predating system propagates its efficiency among fooled mouths decades smothering, but America has to cope with challenges from cheap human society's crowd, the bubble of wastes, esp eastern Asia and Islamic states. its time to show who is the chosen. now time for Trump to discipline US and get rid of cheap mob's siege. time for beautiful new One world of Christian, around Israel. time to manifest the world developmental power is not cheap human cattle's clouds, nor cheap dictation in Communism, nor terrorist Muslim. only Christian the life of prosperous, the source of plenty, the due grace God grants. time to clean the planet with AI and robots, time to rid earth off cheap human beings and beast alike terrorist, both too rampant and waste of land and air. this is new mission for Trump, also mission of my Royal China of China Empire reset ahead then lasting 1109 years in democracy and capitalism. this is salvage and gospel of the Son. Feb 28, 2017 At first I lingered gladly in tiny houses, likely with my 2nd elder sister, likely in Japan. then found one of my 3 smartphones missing. in panic I searched everywhere. then using its GPS location found the stealer address. the 2 phone number is mathematical linked: sim card 1 number is added to number 2 card. I really can't afford losing them. then many details on exact secret on the phones and their numbers. just in panic I woke up and recognized in reality my phones all on my desk intact. back to dream I still felt the panic painful. yesterday is fruitful, I published monthly blog release. I watched amazon TV and close watch small woman unstable emotionally broke her husband career and her own life which is totally reckless and hopeless in ruins. I wondered bitch in my life, my son's mom, desperate to hurt, means what for her destiny. the tiny dog steps by steps went insane. my son after a day didn't enable his indoor WIFI, likely under his mad mother's ban. last week I got a surprising gain from QRRS, my once and long time employer, ¥1000. I immediately renew woz's 8 domains with it, left 3 expensive domains for next renewal will costs near ¥2000. God, dad, its a bit dearer since last year, but godaddy China office girl actually privileged me by contacting me and helping me finish the order with coupon unavailable public. dad God, please allow us owning our namespace as family heritage lasting millenniums. I want share them with my offspring! grant us financial freedom to pay the domain registrar. and please grant us to keep our amazon associate account. we had been ditched once for poor websites traffic. I had to mend all amazon ad code among my sites to link with our new trackID. that's too boring and heavy load to sustain. grant us minimum interactive rate amazon requires to sustain our membership of its ad associate. dad God, remove us blockage the small bitch laid between my son and me. show my son, woz, the future world he pivots. bring me sooner my Royal China to extinguish hatred rage, rip us off the dirty family of my son's mom and herself. put us in sanctuary of holy mercy, and sole independence under the dome without divided. thx for the peace in the morning, God.

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©2006-2016 Zhuson.com中美一家神™
benzrad zhu
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