dreamed with my son roamed in remote place near Tianjin, northern China, my university city. I carried my passed mother's corpse and search for service to bury it. we were refuted once for too expensive. then near country fair we met Gao Jun, my once alumnus who soon after army train in beginning of PRC campus migrated from our major Philosophy into Economics, but stayed in dorm of our school girls. her husband or brother inquired our problem and extended his help, out of Chinese taboo, while Miss Gao remained her self-possessed normally among guests in her spacious house in my dream. we likely rested there and waited for more money remit from our relatives, or aided by Gao to settle our funeral. the northern China countryside scene lonely detailed in dream, different from my hometown, central China. last night it drizzled, left wet ground when I went to dorm canteen to breakfast. last night I put 2 pillows in stack and its the highest pillow I ever had with my own, for the cover of my pillar sent to laundry and no replacement. yesterday I half day roaming in dorm, except reading informative web as routine for one or 2 hours. my life more and more turned like an elder's, or even worse, like those retired gathered in gate ball game yard outside near my dorm window view. they found no fun in the game, no challenge, no exciting, but just gather and moving. still there are fights among common Chinese, like the dorm canteen. the operational couples loathed to invest more on food materials, but spare no efforts to advertise, to celebrate its anniversary. the result is fewer and fewer customers. I usually had less than a bowl meat in a week there together. it doesn't hurt me much as a mandated vegetarian, but let me slender. recent months my throat more and more choked by phlegm, I had to cough hard to spit it. my backbone also turned inflexible: after standing up it takes quite few seconds to waist straight from sitting. usually the most exciting moment in a week is gathering my son, woz, on Sunday weekly. his sinful mom tentative separates us, frequently change my son's timetable to drive my son away from my side. God dad, the drizzle turns heavier. dad God, my life runs full and merry. no matter how sinister attempted to ruin it. grant us our web business booming and self-relies. bring us sooner Royal China for better future. bring me my Crown Queen from Japan, Asoh Yukiko, for my second baby, billing zhu. God dad last salary means so much for us. my worn shoes, which embarrassed me again last raining Sunday when it was wet being handled to spa keeper, now replaced by new one. my son glad with his new chromebook bag he chose his own. God dad, in coming alipay credit returning day, let us anxious free. thx God dad, for surfing hard time so smooth regardless PRC war time preparing period, thx for skipping us from trifle grudge in the authority.